Moscow vs. Vienna: Feel The Difference, или о том, как Маргарита Николаевна начала учить английский

Да-да, это не шутка. Примерно через год после начала интенсивного наскока на немецкий я всерьёз задумалась, что английский утекает сквозь пальцы, и если немецкий ещё как-то поддерживается сам собою (языковая среда как-никак), то с английским иногда случаются совсем кранты.

Занимаюсь теперь раз в неделю час по скайпу, с совершенно волшебной барышней, которая бережно выпиливает из моего английского накопившиеся в нём немецкие сорняки.

В качестве одного из заданий я написала эссе о венских сюрпризах в сравнении с Москвой.

Вот, пожалуй, опубликую его здесь. Оно несколько сатирическое, не воспринимайте близко к сердцу.

Moscow vs. Vienna: Feel The Difference

Have you ever been to Moscow? And what about Vienna? Did you notice any difference? Well, that's a rhetorical question - of course, you did. This short story is about those hidden differences that are possible to touch and feel only if you used to live in those cities for quite a while. Disclaimer: I spent around twelve years of my life in Moscow, and have been living in Vienna for only two years. In a word, the dimensions chosen to present the whole picture might be rather subjective. In any case, let's get right to it!

1) Language-friendly interface. Is it possible to survive in Vienna without speaking German? It was my first question when I moved. And the answer is: yes, in 99% of cases. I wouldn't state that everyone here speaks perfect English, but at least in the radius of 50 meters you can easily find someone. Is it possible to survive in Moscow without knowing Russian? Frankly speaking, I’ve never tried, but the answer could be: that’s a challenge. Anyway, for foreigners, Moscow is a city of limited opportunities and extravagant prices.

2) Shopping. If you want to grab some food in Vienna after 7p.m., don't be surprised that the nearest supermarket is already closed. No, it makes no sense to walk to the next one - it is definitely closed, too. Moreover, there are no 24h grocery stores in this city. And please don't even dream about shopping on Sundays: everything is closed, even the big malls and almost all restaurants. Why? Austrians hold on to their work-family balance, so the revenue is not the number one priority. Working on Sundays and at night is not prohibited, but the taxes are so high that nobody sees this as a good business opportunity. After Moscow that never sleeps, Austrian shopping schedule seems to be nonsense. Just imagine “IKEA” or “MEGA” with working hours like “Monday to Saturday, 9a.m.-7p.m.”, or your favorite coffee house that is closed for 2 weeks because of its owner’s vacation.

3) Public transport. After crazy Moscow with its horrible traffic, Vienna is paradise on Earth. It is possible to plan exactly how much time it takes from A to B. You can also choose the kind of transport you want to use: tram, bus, metro or train - according to your preferences. Many destinations are possible to reach on foot or by bike. Even the metro is cozy like a lounge (the rush hour, which is by the way around 4-5p.m. - see p.4, is the only exception to the rule). I would say, time and space perception itself is different in Vienna: if it takes more than 30 minutes to get somewhere, the place seems to be a far far away land, like a different universe. In Moscow I felt lucky when my way from home to office would take less than 1 hour. Although, it should be admitted that Vienna is 10 times smaller compared to Moscow.

4) Motivation and job. Austrians are often considered to be Germans, but their mindsets have almost nothing in common. In general, Austrians aren’t hard-workers at all. In Moscow you feel weird, if you leave your office at 6p.m. In Vienna they finish around 5-6p.m. or even earlier: “if the weather nice is”. My husband works here in a Russian bank, and every time they hire an Austrian, the guy is unable to survive over the trial period, because he immediately understands he actually has to work. In other words: being successful in Moscow means to work hard, being successful in Vienna means to be relaxed.

5) Party time. As I’ve mentioned before, the citizens of Vienna are very relaxed. So relaxed, that they basically have no need to party. “Moscow never sleeps, Vienna goes to sleep at nine” - that’s my main observation so far. After 10 o’clock the streets of Vienna look like a Zombieland: locals are commonly at home at this time. Even on Friday evening it’s not an easy task to find a vibrant place to go out. The best way to get “a proper party” is to do it yourself. Of course, you need to plan it in advance (see p.2) and take into account that your neighbors would probably call the police if it happens that you are listening to soft jazz with a glass of wine after 10 o’clock.

6) Cult of water. Probably, the thing I love the most about Vienna is its tap water. Every morning I’m completely happy when I just fill my glass with fresh cold water from the tap and drink it as if it’s a magical elixir. The quality of water coming directly from the Alps’ springs is incomparable even with a bottled “Evian” that you could buy in Moscow. One more miracle of Vienna is that tap water in restaurants and cafes is always served for free (and this option is unlimited!). People often say cafes in Vienna are very expensive, but just imagine how much money you’ll save by not buying unnecessary drinks, if you substitute them with water.

7) Street style and fashion. I was very surprised when I realized that femininity is a sort of deadly sin in Vienna (unless you are an Austrian grandma sipping a glass of champagne in front of the Opera House wearing a hat decorated with roses). “You must firstly be a human being, a personality, there is no need to show you’re a woman” – believe Austrian female-human-beings in old sweaters and grey jeans. Austrian gentlemen don’t share this opinion, but that’s a whole different story… Women of Vienna rarely wear skirts and dresses, remembering the existence of high heels and earrings only on holidays (to remember doesn’t imply to put them on). And I would better say nothing about makeup and perfume. Everything that seems pretty casual for women in Moscow means “too much” here. I hardly ever wear pants or jeans, so I’m frequently asked by Austrian girls: “How do you live in winter? It’s cold to wear dresses”. I’m kidding in answer: the same way women did in 19th century. On the other hand, I often receive compliments from strangers regarding my outfit. One day I even had a discussion with a Viennese guy on “why Austrian ladies don’t look like ladies anymore”. On the contrary, men in Vienna are dressed much better than in Moscow. My hypothesis is in Russia we have the opposite situation: paying a lot of attention to your style is not encouraged if you’re a man.

8) Empty flats. One more surprise for foreigners and expats is that all flats in Vienna are rented white-and-empty. Being white-and-empty means: all that can be painted will be painted white (in order to make you feel like in hospital), there’ll be absolutely no furniture (except for a toilet bowl and a fridge) and most commonly no ceiling lamps (you’re suggested to enjoy just ceiling wires instead). Imagine how much trouble it brings, when you relocate to Austria from another country. And the second portion of trouble comes when you’re going to move into another flat: you need to take all the furniture with you, regardless of whether it fits your new flat or not.

9) Coffee culture. Vienna is famous for its old and rich coffee culture. What’s funny is that it absolutely doesn’t guarantee you to easily find good coffee there. Moreover, after two years of living in Vienna I’ve discovered only four places where you can grab fairly tolerable coffee. And no, I’m not a coffee gourmet: in Moscow I’m quite satisfied with a cup of cappuccino from “Shokoladnitsa”. The essence of Viennese traditional coffee culture is not coffee itself, but the process of sitting the whole day in a coffee house with only one cup of espresso which probably has such an awful taste that you simply don’t want to get another one.

10) Politeness. The first three German words that you learn when you are in Vienna are ‘bitte’, ‘danke’ and [the craziest one to pronounce] ‘entschuldigung’ (please, thank you and sorry). You will definitely use these words hundreds of times a day, as typical Austrians do. The level of politeness looks incredible for foreigners, especially for Russians. I still feel awkward when in Moscow I automatically behave like in Austria, saying 10 times ‘bitte’ and ‘danke’ while buying a bottle of water in a supermarket, and finishing up a shocked lady at the cash desk with my “have a nice weekend”. By the way, in Vienna, if you step on somebody’s foot on a train, both should say “I’m sorry”.

To be continued by a multiple number of paragraphs…